Many parents wonder whether their child can choose which parent to live with after a separation or divorce. It’s a common question during custody disputes in New Jersey — and an important one. While a child’s preference matters, there is no specific age when a child can make that choice on their own. Courts in New Jersey decide custody based on what is in the child’s best interests, not simply on the child’s wishes.
If you’re facing custody issues in New Jersey, understanding how courts weigh a child’s opinion can help you prepare for what comes next.
How Custody Works in New Jersey
New Jersey recognizes two types of custody: legal and physical.
- Legal custody gives parents the right to make major decisions about their child’s health, education, and welfare.
- Physical custody refers to where the child lives day to day.
In many cases, parents share joint custody, but sometimes one parent has primary custody while the other has visitation. If parents cannot agree, the court will decide custody according to the child’s best interests under New Jersey law.
Does a Child Get a Say in Custody Decisions?
Yes, but not full control. A child’s preference is one of many factors a judge considers in custody cases. The court will listen to a child’s wishes if the judge believes the child is mature enough to express a reasonable opinion.
This does not mean a child’s preference automatically decides the outcome. Instead, it becomes part of the overall picture the court uses to determine what arrangement serves the child’s well-being.
When Can a Judge Consider a Child’s Preference?
Under N.J.S.A. 9:2-4(c), a judge may take a child’s preference into account when deciding custody, provided the child has sufficient age and capacity to form an intelligent decision.
There’s no strict age requirement, but generally, children aged 12 and older may have their opinions considered more seriously. Judges sometimes speak privately with the child in chambers to learn their thoughts without pressure from either parent.
Still, even a teenager’s wishes can be overruled if the court believes a different arrangement better protects the child’s emotional or physical welfare.
Other Factors Courts Consider
New Jersey courts evaluate several factors when determining custody.
In addition to the child’s preference, a judge may look at:
- The parents’ ability to agree and cooperate on child-related issues
- The relationship between the child and each parent
- The child’s safety, stability, and home environment
- Each parent’s fitness, including any history of domestic violence, abuse, or neglect
- The child’s school performance and community ties
- The needs of siblings and extended family relationships
- The distance between parents’ homes and each parent’s work schedule
These factors help the court form a full understanding of what arrangement supports the child’s long-term growth and happiness.
How Parents Can Support Their Child During Custody Decisions
Custody cases are emotionally difficult for children.
Parents can make the process easier by:
- Avoiding negative talk about the other parent
- Encouraging honest, open communication
- Reassuring the child that both parents love them
- Keeping adult disputes away from the child
- Focusing on stability and consistency in daily routines
A supportive approach helps your child feel secure and respected, no matter what the final custody decision looks like.
Contact the Monmouth County Child Custody Lawyers at The Law Office of Jennifer J. McCaskill, LLC for Help Today
If you’re navigating custody issues and wondering how your child’s preferences might affect the outcome, we’re here to help. At The Law Office of Jennifer J. McCaskill, LLC, our Monmouth County child custody lawyers have years of experience guiding parents through sensitive family law matters with compassion and skill.
We can explain how New Jersey’s custody laws apply to your situation, help you prepare for court, and work toward an arrangement that serves your child’s best interests.
To learn more and get the help you deserve, call The Law Office of Jennifer J. McCaskill, LLC, our divorce & family law firms in Red Bank. NJ are ready for anything. Call us at (732) 747-1882 or contact us online today.
You can also visit our law firm at 157 Broad St #111, Red Bank, NJ 07701.
